schizoids.info
LACK
OF SELF-CONFIDENCE
A
problem created by failure
"During
the worst time of my life, one of the attributes that I lacked was confidence
in myself.
I could not be assertive, nor
present myself to others.
it was almost too painful for me to do anything ...
I
could not go anywhere, nor be part of anything.
I
was a dwarf, scared and intimidated by the World.
The profound
insecurity I felt sometimes made me think:
"If
I continue like this, I will be too fearful to breathe"
Only
in solitude, in the sanctuary of my room, could I regain my dignity.
There
I could read, write, think and be objective. There I could be a person "
Mikel
(Author)
Social psychologists
agree that self-confidence is one of the requirements for psychological
well-being (happiness).
The loss or
lack of self-confidence is a problem that can affect anyone.
For
schizoids, this problem is difficult to escape because,
though they
try, according to conventional norms, to succeed at work or in relationships,
their efforts fail repeatedly.
This continuous sense of
failure, eventually causes their self-confidence to crumble.
1 - GENETIC
INHERITANCE AND ENVIRONMENT
Like many other human
qualities, both genetics and the environment play a role in self-confidence.
However, self-confidence is
not immutable, and life experiences may increase or decrease a person’s
self-confidence at different times throughout life.
Thus, the opportunity does
exist to improve our self-confidence.
2 –
SELF-CONFIDENCE ALLOWS US TO DO THE FOLLOWING:
- defend oneself
- present oneself
- ask questions
- handle
criticism
- express ourselves
- Say NO
- make
requests
- negotiate
- begin or
terminate conversations
- give thanks and apologize
3 – SELF-CONFIDENCE IS BOOSTED BY THE FOLLOWING:
** positive events in your life
** the support you receive
** expectations of good
** the affection you receive,
** social networks
that support you,
** achieving
success
** friends
and allies
** knowing that you are loved and valued
** having someone at your side
** working productively
** enjoying life ....
4 – THE
FOLLOWING DIMINISH YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE:
when everything goes badly
when all
doors of opportunity seem to shut
when you
have no personal sanctuary
when your
personal tasks become impossible
when you
feel alone and isolated
when you
feel that you mean nothing to anyone
when you do
not succeed
when you
fail in the working environment
when you
fail to establish a social support network
when you do
not have a viable life plan or goal
when you
have no idea how to move your life forward
....
5 - HOW TO RECOVER SELF-CONFIDENCE
Working on
point 3, and specifically on the aspects that depend on you
** actively
seek a way to succeed at anything, however small
** holding down a job
** being productive
**
developing your natural abilities
** being
useful in the community
** taking pleasure in something
** avoiding isolation
** having a
life plan or a goal
6- ASSERTIVENESS
Assertiveness
is the quality that enables us to present or assert ourselves to others.
Being assertive also enables
us to defend ourselves against possible abuse.
Sometimes assertiveness is presented as a
separate quality but,
in reality,
it is inexorably linked with self-confidence.
So,
everything that applies to self-confidence, also applies to assertiveness.
Page created in December
2011 © Copyright