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Social contacts
Relations and friends
The
typical feeling in the social relations
of the schizoid one is the
indifference
1 - The schizoid and
the avoidant
In DSM-I
and DSM-2nd was not mentioned the avoidant group. His traits were integrated
into the group of schizoid ones.
In DSM-III appear for 1st time the schizoid
and avoidant in different groups.
Social relations of the schizoid ones are dominated by the indifference. Those of
the avoidant, by a strong anxiety.
In the high types this feature is defined with clarity. But, as we depart
from pure types, the schizoid
indifference
it leaves mixing with something or a lot of anxiety. They remain still schizoid, low or medium, but its social relations
present already anxiety.
2 –
The space of security
Out of our farms
the animal life is present with a purpose simple: to eat and not to
be eaten.
Anyone can
observe how the animals of the forest have his security space. If we entered , the animal flees...
The human beings now they live in sure spaces and we are
not sensitive to our security
space. Remember that our ancestors had
this security space...
However nowadays this
space and the fear that appears when someone invades this space, it is
still present in our genetic arsenal , in
some individuals and among them in someone schizoid avoidant.
This dread emerges when the subject feels that
someone - as if he/she was observing – invades their security space . The dread is irrational,
uncontrollable.
Some schizoid avoidant say that they flee of social relations because
“they are invaded ”. Others only assert that “need to flee”.
3- Hypothesis : a “error” of the evolution
In the beginning there were the living beings. Some species survived and
others were extinguished. The successful species developed the adequate resources
to survive. Among these resources the instincts are standing out: The
self-preservation and reproduction.
One of the sources that triggered and activated
the instinct of self-preservation is fear.
Fear has risen as a useful mechanism for survival.
When a bad situation concerning the survival is
detected, a feeling of discomfort arises, and as the danger is increasing, the
felling passes on to fear and panicThe
part which regulates the full range of
anxious emotions lies in the brain.
During the path of evolution the human being develops a new brain over the old
one and the mechanism of the fear wins in nuances, but the control
headquarters remain in the old brain, specifically in a gland called amygdala. Our mechanism of
fear still has its instinctive nature, with its characteristics of unreasonableness
and automation.The influence of the new brain, the thinking and the reasoning
on the emotions of fear is scarce.
It is difficult to control our fears by
reasoning with them. Sometimes it is impossible. With time the emotions and affections are developed from the first
instincts, but they still have their starting point in the old brain.
The verification of a threat remains an
instinctive and automatic evaluation.This instinctive nature of fear leads, in
the case of a schizoid avoidant to an unfortunate reality: the system
automatically evaluates and interprets the presence of another human being as
bad (for survival), and a corresponding emotion of fear in any of their ranges
is triggered..
4- Inaccessible of Learning
Every day our nervous system is recording new experiences, which lead to learning. These lessons will be
converted into patterns that will influence our behaviour.
So we will come to know that something will
produce satisfaction, will cause problems, and something else is dangerous.
If a particular situation affects us again and again with some sort of damage we learn that it is bad and that it should be avoided.
If the same situation ceases to cause harm we will learn that now it
is not bad anymore, and that there is no reason to avoid it,
although we will have some prevention because of previous experiences.
Having to cope with situations of danger for our
well-being, will make us feel tension
and unrest.
The daily experience in reality teaches the social anxious that in social relations there is no danger, that there's nothing to fear, that nothing bad ever
happens to you, that you're not assaulted ...
But this learning is incapable of entering into the functioning of the mechanism of social fear. It should, because the person knows
and learns about it, but this is not the case.
This learning which has a more rational
character, is incapable of changing the structure of social fear, which is more
primitive, more related to the primitive instinctual
life. The fear remains inaccessible to social learning.
It's as if at an early age there had been a "punch", which cannot be changed, even with
something as convincing as the one’s experiences.
5- Eye
Contact
When two
people meet they shake their hands to greet. The hidden meaning of that act is
that both say: ‘I come in peace. Here is my hand, it is not armed.’
Then friendship is shown by shaking each
other hand. The hand shaking and eye
contact must be done simultaneously.
Then, they
have a conversation. The one who speaks looks the other one in the eye, which
is the most expressive part. The one who listens also looks the speaker in the
eye. Eye contact is established.
Their eyes meet without fear. There is communication, there is empathy.
Some
people, when establishing eye contact, get a bad feeling.This
people get away from the eye contact and the conversation looses its honesty.
The body language that gets lost in the
process says: ‘I am not feeling well and I want to end this as soon as
possible.’
Some speakers
can think that the lack of that body language is saying: ‘I don’t like you, I
don’t want your friendship.’
It can also happen
that a person of those characteristics does not even try and establish eye
contact, looks towards another directions. And when he/she quickly meets the
speakers eye, he/she does it with elusive eyes, without stopping, without
really establishing eye contact.
(This web page is available …..in Spanish …….in French)
Webpage
updated on July 2, 2010 . Copyright (c) 2008-2010 schizoids.info